I am convinced that the writers of the ‘Vampire Diaries’ are trying to simultaneously rip my heart out and make all of my wildest dreams come true at the very same time.
After weeks and weeks of biting our nails anxiously for some actual promo of the new episodes coming in October, last night we were treated to a confection of heartbreak and loss that I am not sure my heart will ever recover from, at least not until they heal it and bring Damon back.
In case you have not seen the promo before I start dissecting every square inch of it, here it is. I was not prepared for what is to follow, so I am giving you an advance warning to grab a box of tissues and maybe some fake nails in case you bite yours off during this masterpiece.
I am not going to lie, as of the writing of this post, I have probably watched this trailer on a loop so as not to forget the incredible scenes of Delena and the entire cast of characters grieving his loss.
Because the loss of Damon, no matter how much some of them may hate or dislike him, is a loss that is rocking everyone to their core because of how influential he is, because of how important he is to everyone in that town.
So *stretches out fingers* let’s try to break this down in all of its mind-blowing, heartbreaking majesty.
I am not even going to avoid the truth. This breaks my heart just as much as the Delena parts do. Jeremy has lost basically everyone except his sister, who is now a living breathing shell of her former self.
But Jeremy has lost his mother and father first, a loss that first propelled him into doing hard drugs and dealing, and then lost Vickie and was compelled to forget her death, and then he lost Anna, and now he has lost Bonnie, and Damon, who was slowly evolving into a parental figure to him.
Is it any wonder then that Jeremy is trying to find comfort through any means necessary? Even if it’s at the bottom of a bottle? It’s the only way he knows how to cope because this loss is too horrific to even be attempted to be dealt with in a rational way.
He lost Damon, he lost Bonnie.
And the people that are still left for him, are falling apart at the seams because of the sheer trauma and disbelief of their loss, even four months later it’s still just as bad, if not worse, than it was when it first happened.
"I need you to give me hope."
"Damon is gone. You need to say goodbye, too."
I have watched this a million times and you know what? It both breaks my heart and makes me mad at the same time. Not mad because of Elena, the poor girl is looking for any possible way to just hold on long enough to find a solution to all of this, but it makes me a little bit mad that she is calling Stefan for hope, and he is all but telling her there is none, and she needs to “move on.”
How can she move on when she had the man she “singularly believed she would spent eternity with” ripped from her arms? The shock of that, even four months later, would still be just as potent as it was when it first happened.
And if there is one thing we know to be true about Elena Gilbert, it’s that she does not grieve like a normal human being (or vampire) does. While she was human, she felt grief powerfully, her compassion being the Achilles heel for her.
As a vampire, it was magnified to include all facets of the negative human emotion when the going got bad. Her compassion and love is a wonderful gift to have, and one that probably saved her as a vampire, but when she is experiencing the loss of not only Damon, but her best friend at the same time, it’s one of those times where Elena is sitting at the precipice of an emotional breakdown because of the complexity and horror of what happened back in that graveyard.
All Elena has is hope, no matter how far or how wide it may be, and she is probably being told repeatedly that there is zero hope because of the impossibility of Damon and Bonnie coming back from this.
Elena smelling his shirt.
ELENA SMELLING HIS SHIRT!
This could not break my heart more if it tries. This is someone who has not only lost a boyfriend and gone through more loss than most people twice her age, but has lost the one she was not afraid to admit she saw a future with.
Damon was her future.
Now he is gone.
And that heartbreaking fact could not be any clearer to Elena. She is trying as hard as she can to hold on to the memory of Damon. Vampires have forever to live if the universe so deems it acceptable, but what is probably scaring Elena is that she will forget him.
Not just the person, because she could never forget someone so important to her, but she is scared that she will lose even the simplest of memories of him, and that includes the smell that only belongs to Damon Salvatore.
His items, his personal possessions that were once probably so meaningless to her, now hold everything she is trying so hard not to let go of. His shirts all probably still have his distinct smell on them, and that is something she will fight tooth and nail to preserve as long as she can.
The memories may blur together for her in her grief, but one thing she knows is real and true in a world that is now falling apart around her, is the tangible scent of his smell that is now like a window to a time where everything was once peaceful and okay.
The pictures of them.
The pictures that make up a loving and profound romance is now the only physical reminder Elena has of Damon and the love they shared for one another. Damon is not a sentimental person, he only has a few items here and there of his past travels and adventures, and does not really like to clutter his home with those kinds of mementos, but Elena is the exact opposite.
She is a collector of memories. Her journal being her most valuable possession until right after her parents died. It is completely in the realm of possibility for her to goad Damon into taking a picture with her during the summer of their dreams, and then frame it to keep as a lasting reminder of how real and true their love is, never thinking for one moment that that photo would be all she had of him several months later.
The picture not only speaks to how important saving up those moments with him was to her, but it also speaks to the smiles on both their faces. Elena in particular, looked so darn happy in this picture with him, laughing in the face of those who assume she could never be happy with someone like Damon.
And Damon, well Damon, got the girl of his dreams. The man who drunkenly told Andie that he was in love with someone he could never have, had not only ‘gotten the girl’ but had gotten the love of his life, and had gotten someone who not only loved him, but loved him enough to know that saving up memories with him was just as important as actually being in the moment.
Pictures of us, pictures of them, is one of the only things Elena has to keep herself going.
If there is one thing that is abundantly clear it’s that Elena simply cannot exist in a world that does not include the love of her life. Consider that it has been four months since their tragedy, and she is still in the same emotional abyss that she was in when she first heard the news of his death, even more so now that the shock has long-since settled in.
It’s not immediately clear who she is speaking with, but from what I can gather, it’s most likely Luke Parker, who was the one responsible for Damon not returning at all.
It makes perfect sense for Elena to corner him at Whitmore, or for him to come and see her himself, and be rewarded with an Elena who is so close to the breaking point that it is not even funny, and who is demanding to “see” him.
Even though it won’t be as simple as Luke or Liv casting a spell to bring them back, for Elena, it’s all that she has is the hope that one of them can bring the spell that would bring him back.
One other theory that I have is that Luke brings a way for her to see him in hallucinations, a theory that I will explore in more detail later.
But whatever the reason for her speaking to him, I assume that she has exhausted all of her resources to bringing Damon back another way and is turning to the last person she ever wanted to have help them.
Killing people? Check.
Wearing clothes that are either his or similar? Check.
We always knew that Damon and Elena were alike in both big and small ways, and that their intense bond was born out of the little understood twin flame bond, one soul born into two people, but we had no idea just how alike they really were until this promo came out.
Damon and Elena’s entire romance is born out of carefully written and depicted parallels, and it was all but a foregone conclusion in most of our minds that Damon’s death would only serve to highlight the deep and profound bond they have, but this goes way beyond that and silently confirms the unspoken truth among the writers and crew that Damon and Elena are twin flames.
It was a major plot in the books, and from everything that we have been shown lately, especially in the finale and in this promo, it is all but a certainty now.
Elena is doing everything consciously to keep him close—and in that haze of grief that she is currently in, she begins to unconsciously emulate him in order to feel closer to him, in order to feel that she still has some semblance of him somewhere inside of her.
It’s very difficult to tell from the brief flash we get, but it looks like Elena not only sought this woman out, but she caused her car accident based off what looks to me like a busted windshield.
This is Elena at her absolute worst.
Something she never wanted to do and did not while Damon was alive, but those times are far behind her and she has lost the only person who made her feel alive in death, and who accepted her for who she was, and taught her the right way to be a vampire.
People grieve in vastly different ways. That has always been universally accepted and taught by all of the top doctors and medical experts known to man, but what those doctors and medical experts never took into consideration was the unique and different way Elena would find to grieve the man she loves.
Julie Plec gave us a foreshadow to this when she told us that the ways Elena would grieve Damon would be different and not altogether healthy. At the time, it was only a guess as to what she could mean, what she could mean that would push Elena into a level of grief that was not previously experienced or known to her.
Now we know.
She is taking drugs to hallucinate Damon. The real thing is still far beyond her reach, and she simply cannot handle that. It’s either hallucinate him to whatever degree she can, or sink even further into the depression and loss she is currently in.
Never before has she grieved this way, never before has she turned to alternate means to reclaim those she lost. Damon is different, Damon was the one person who she never believed would leave her.
Now that he has, she is left scrambling for a way to keep him close to her.
This is where my theory about Luke comes in. I think when Elena told him “I need to see Damon” he gave her “witchy drugs” to be able to see him.
Perhaps in his mind, if he can’t succeed in righting the wrongs he did, he could at least help her to see him whenever she wanted to, even if it was all a figment of her tortured mind.
A million different things could be taken from this mind-blowing, devastating scene right here. Elena has taken to abusing drugs supplied to her by the witches to hallucinate the presence of Damon, and whether or not this is a hallucination of Damon or his spirit talking to her, could be up for debate, but that doesn’t really matter right now in the grand scheme of what I am trying to say.
Elena sensing Damon’s presence.
Damon and Elena connecting on a SPIRITUAL level.
Damon telling Elena to “move on.”
That, to me, is the most heartbreaking moment of this entire promo because he can see how utterly devastated she still is even after all those months, and even though he wants to come back to her and is fighting for that with all his might, he does not want to see her so miserable and sad all the time.
His “move on” was telling her it was okay, because after all that time, she deserved some peace and quiet and some kind of chance to mourn him properly.
This promo, in a nutshell, was both the best and the worst thing that could have happened to our delicate DE feelings, especially coming at such a crucial time right now.
And as much as I hate seeing Elena suffer like this, it only reinforces my firm belief of the eventual endgame that she and Damon will have, and the most beautiful and amazing reunion!
True Love Prevails; universe be damned
Thanks for reading, guys!